this is where i hideout

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I know some people already know this, but as an official statement, I'm moving home in April. That is all.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

One month has passed since the word go,
I'm looking forwards 'cause I know.
It's worth all the trouble
I'll be home soon.

This tired mind it will become,
First in command and we'll have won.
Since it's inception
I thought I knew.

This story was enchanting at the start...
Now it's just eating at my heart.
I'll be alright and I'll move on...
Living in circles on and on.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Something about the combination of Garden State, Tegan and Sara, and Granny Smith apples is making me feel alive. I actually cried at the end of the movie. I never do that. I never cry, and in the last month I've cried twice. What's going on?

The sun is peeking thru the clouds, and I'm thinking about sitting on the roof for awhile. Maybe I'll light up the ol' pipe. We need some re-acquaintance. I went to Superstore last night on my way home from work and picked up some groceries. Problem = 4 bags. So I couldn't carry all the bags, and hold the umbrella over my head at the same time. Did I mention that I hate the rain? Well I've been thinking a lot lately about accepting things for what they are, and enjoying them because hey, they're all we have. I applied this concept to the rain last night, and believe it or not, it worked! Yes, I actually grew accustomed to the rain on my head, and the fact that my wool coat was getting soaked. And I didn't die, and I didn't catch a cold, and it was ok.

I really hope that it's possible to get down to Piper's Cabin. Simon maybe you know? I've been feeling that place lately. Remember when we went exploring down there? Walking across that log, and the beaver dams. And the hill. Peeing in the snow.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

"well on the walk home from work i was walking rather quickly, and realized it, and slowed the pace down. i thought about making a film about a man who did everything really slowly. not so much because he was slow, but because he took the time to enjoy every little thing the fullest extent possible.

and i was thinking about the garbage on the street. and that i should start carrying around 2 garbage bags. one for the trip to work, and one for the trip home. and i'd just pick up any garbage i found along the way. and then i thought if everyone did that, the world would be so clean. and people might eventually stop throwing stuff on the ground, cause they'd just end up picking it up

and i thought about how i like walking. and how i like smoking, even though it's bad for me and i don't do it all the time. but i do like it. and i like eating digestive cookies."

*note: these comments were taken from an MSN conversation. i hope the person they were directed to is not offended by their posting. it's just that i thought that these particular words demonstrated my feelings quite accurately.*

Friday, January 20, 2006

Credit to Brendan for that picture. Hilarious.

Here are my (brief) thoughts on the election:

Conservatives: I won't vote for them because I don't believe in joining up the the US Missile Defence Program. I also don't think we should change our gay-marriage laws, or legislate against abortion (even though I think it's a horrible option, but it's up to the individual, not the government). I also think that politics and religion should be kept very seperate. It seems to me that there are more than a handfull of Conservative candidates who believe otherwise.

Liberals: I won't vote for them because they have royally screwed up their finances, run a horrible campain, not to mention the internal issues within the party. If there is ever going to be another successful Liberal government, the party needs to unite behind a new leader. And they need to clean up their act.

NDP: I won't vote for them because I really don't like Jack Layton's mustache. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against mustaches, but I just don't think it suits him. If he can't even see the problems on his own face, how well could he run a country?

Independant: I don't vote for independants because I don't know them personally.

So, I'm left with the Green Party. I actually did some research, read the platform, and listened to Jim Harris give a speech. I'm quite impressed. They're not just a bunch of hippies anymore. He had some really good things to say. So I'm quite confident and proud to say that I'm voting Green because I really believe that they have some really good ideas, and even if they don't get any seats, every vote counts for a bit of money for the next election. That's my bit.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Ok, who is the dumbass who missed 10,000? C'mon people, I mean, a chance to have me do anything you wish? Isn't that worth anything to anyone? Jeepers Creepers.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Right now I'm eating a giant salad consisting of: red pepper, celery, cucumber, carrot, mushrooms, spinach, corned beef, cheese, and apples. No dressing. I don't like dressing on salads. Anyway the point of this post is to say that:

If you're the 10,000th visitor, I'll do anything you ask* so leave a comment!!

(the counter is on the left at the bottom of the column)

*maybe

Saturday, January 14, 2006

You know, I tried to write a bunch of stuff just now, to figure it out. And I'm come to a conclusion. I don't know what the hell is going on, and I'd better get used to it, cause it seems life is just like that.

It doesn't make any sense at the emotional level. And I learnt my lesson once that turning off the emotion tap is a bad idea. It makes you into a nasty person. So I refuse to do that. But then what am I supposed to do with all this emotion? I have no outlet. And even if I had an outlet, I'm not sure I want certain emotions to disappear. Some things I don't want to forget.

So way back when the Rubik's cube first came out, they gave a bunch of them to some kids to see what happened. Surprisingly, the children were able to complete the task in a matter of minutes, compared to adults who would take hours, some of them not figuring it out at all. The kids were somehow able to see the solution. They were thinking outside the box.

I don't like boxes. I think that's the problem I have with any sort of organized religion. It puts your thinking into a box. There are certain things that happened no matter what, and if you think otherwise, you're wrong. There are guidelines, rules, and sins. What if we made all that up?

How does this apply to my origional point you may wonder. Yes, well, I'm trying to think outside the box and figure this all out. That's my point. And it's not working. That's my other point. Maybe it's not supposed to work. Maybe we aren't supposed to figure it out. Maybe we're just supposed to live and experience for the sole purpose of living and experiencing. How can you know love if you've never known hate? How can you know joy if you've never known pain and suffering?

What happens when we've experienced everything? Does the soul enter a state of just knowing? Just being? Maybe that's heaven. I don't know anything anymore.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

I think this will last longer than 5 days. Amelia and I called it quits, again. Reasons I won't get into on the interweb, but they're good reasons. I understand and she understands, but that doesn't make it easy on the heart. We've had a lot of fun together, and I wouldn't trade that history for anything. But now I must move on.

I might be moving back to the prairies sooner than previously thought. There may be a great career opportunity for me...something I couldn't pass up. I really hope it works out, because I'd love to be back home, and I'd love to have a good job.

So, 2006 brings about great changes, and we're only a week in. Should be an interesting year!